Sacramento Parent Magazine

4:00pm Enter yoga center to take first yoga class ever.
4:01pm Re-check yoga schedule because there is clearly an age difference and maybe a senior class was chosen by mistake.
4:02pm Nope, it’s correct and you soon find out that grandma did not get run over by a reindeer but is able to contort herself into a warrior pose while you contort your face from pain.
4:10pm Why are the lights out?
4:12pm Someone is breathing way too loud.
4:13pm Realize you can’t even touch your toes.
4:18pm Teacher has had to tell you twice now “the other way”. Didn’t know left and right would be so confusing when your arms are strangling your ankles, reaching behind you while trying to look at the sky.
4:20pm Seriously, we need to pick another pose.
4:30pm Give up on embryo pose. Besides if you had access to those parts of your body, why be in a relationship?
4:45pm Uh, oh bodily emissions in the room. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT giggle.
5:10pm Ah, nice little siesta at the end. Try not to think about who else uses these blankets.

I knew the economy was going down the toilet because my obsessive news watcher husband has made sure I am well informed of every stock crisis, unemployment line debacle, and dow plunging catastrophe. But I had no idea actually how bad it was until I was told Mervyns was closing. Mervyns is closing! What do you mean! I am not a die hard Mervyns fan or anything. I definitely am not standing at the doors saying, “Open, Open.” But it’s Mervyns for petes sakes. I think the retail store has a special spot in all new mom’s hearts because where else can you go with a 5 month old who gets up at 5am? That’s right when the rest of the world is slumbering away, new moms around the States are loaded up the baby, the humongous diaper bag, and even bigger stroller to head off to Mervyns. I can remember already being up for what felt like an ETERNITY before driving down to unload all the gear and stroll around the different departments. It was so much easier to shop for a handbag, infant pajamas, and new shoes all in one location without unloading and loading the amazing amount of stuff that goes along with having a baby. It was so simple to loop the blue Mervyns bag around the stroller and saunter off to just look around. If you went fast enough, the baby would eventually sleep and life was the best it could ever be at the moment. Even if you had to steer clear of the jean racks because who can fathom trying on new jeans when you just gave birth 5 short months ago?
I actually haven’t been to Mervyns in years since I discovered I was somewhere between the women’s wear and the graffiti tees with disgusting skinny pants. I have moved on to Macy’s and Nordstrom but Mervyns will always hold a special place in my baby memories. I would never had made it through those early mornings without you Mervyns and you will truly be missed.